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Prologue: Time's are Changing.

"He's gone?" Was all Otto Octavius, now stolen the identity of Peter Parker said. His greatest victory.

He rose from the chair as he removed the device on his head. A device that was used to eliminate the remains of his greatest enemy. But not only eliminated, but humiliated and "proved" to Peter Parker that he was the better Spider-Man.

"I'm free..." Octavius said as he grinned a somewhat dark smile as he killed Peter both in body and mind. He had done it. Peter has been ripped clean from existence. Otto then rises from the chair and looked at the mirror, admiring his new youth that he'd taken and realized just how it feels to win.

It was then he heard his cellphone ring. He looked down and saw it was Mary Jane Watson , the woman Peter loved and the woman Otto originally lusted over before he felt he needed to keep her "safe". He decided to ignore it, he wanted to gloat more into his victory instead. Moments later the call went straight to voicemail and he heard MJ's voice and said "Hey Peter! I've been calling for a while and I felt that we need to talk. I need to ask if your alright because the Peter I know would never be a recluse and stay away from those who care! So please I need to man up, come see me."

"What did that woman said!" Octavius yelled in rage. Did she insult his pride? Octavius was not one who took insults, in fact he nearly killed two villains who have. Otto then began to ponder and realized Peter still exists as his allies still know him and as such Peter still "stains" his world view.

"No! I can't be superior if Peter still holds me down! If I must make me and this world superior, all aspects of Parker must be erased! With my unbounded genius, I'll erase Peter's worst enemies...and greatest allies! I have such great power and is my responsibility to do justice! Parker was a blight to this world and his presence creates more problems then good! Hell I'm giving his allies a favor, eventually the will die a horrible death and I'm simply giving them a mercy killing. So says The Superior Spider-Man!" Octavius thought to himself as reaches to his computer begins to formulate a plan to create his utopia, a "superior" world.

Meanwhile in a different time...

New York City in the year 2099 A.D. In a future with some the greatest advancements in human history, one man will discover one of the greatest disasters instead.

Alchemax HQ, specifically the speculative science division, head scientist Miguel O'Hara aka the Spider-Man of the year 2099 looks at serveral screens, showing different heroes of the modern times fighting villains and saving lives. This machine was a "time window", it allowed the view to see into various incidents in the past, but it was prototype and can only view the past by at most a full century.

But this didn't matter to Miguel, as he was staring at one screen. It showed Octavius moments after purging Peter from his mind. For months O'Hara has been analyzing Octavius's activities behind his company's back, who didn't notice this change of history, but Miguel was smart enough to see the dangers. Miguel saw that time has been "cracking" by various instances such as the Avengers facing Kang, Scarlet Witch's change on reality with Magneto and changed it back while bringing mutants to near extinction, and how Ultron converted the world to his own totalitarian image. Each change in reality has been damaging the time stream, but it can heal if no more major change to time itself happens.

"Octavius you idiot." O'Hara thought to himself as he looks into the screen showing Otto putting on his Spider-Man costume. The screen then does it's usual time jump of a few weeks, showing Otto fighting The Green Goblin, both surrounded by the bodies of several thugs dressed in goblin masks.

Miguel then backed off the screen as he knew things are going from bad to worst. According to the history books, this incident shouldn't have happened, but the screens don't lie, Octavius is going to do what he promised, destroy Peter's friends and foes. O'Hara went to a wall and pressed a panel and was transported to a darker portion of the Alchemax building, Miguel's Spider-Man "hideout".

"Computer! Analyze the time stream fluctuations!" Miguel ordered as he grabbed several devices, including a watch-like gadget be pressed and created his own Spider-Man costume in a flash of light.

Spider-Man 2099 then goes to his own computer as it says "ANALYSIS COMPLETE. TIME STREAM DATA SHOWS MASSIVE AREAS OF CORRUPTION AFTER PETER PARKER'S BODY WAS TAKEN OVER BY OTTO OCTAVIUS."

"I shocking knew..." Miguel whispered to himself . He has been studying Otto's activities in the past for weeks and didn't understand how what has been written in history and what is happening in the past doesn't correlate.

"Computer, what would happen if Octavius stays in Peter Parker's body?" Spider-Man 2099 asks.

"IF OCTAVIUS REMAINS AS THE PREVIOUS SPIDER-MAN, HE WILL CAUSE THE DEATHS OF VARIOUS INDIVIDUALS IN PETER'S LIFE WHO WEREN'T MEANT TO DIE AT THAT TIME. THIS MASSIVE CHANGE IN THE TIMESTREAM WILL CAUSE A CHAIN REACTION TO WHICH RESULTS I CAN NOT PREDICT..." The computer answered.

"But what the hell does that mean?!" Miguel yelled, angry on the vague answer.

"It means that time cannot be predicted because time is dying..." An ominous female voice is heard.

Miguel quickly turned around and saw a glowing female humanoid figure with long flowing red hair and web-like patterns in her eyes.

"Who the shock are you!?" Spider-Man 2099 demanded as readied for a fight.

The figure simply did a slight cough and said "Forgive me, I am an astral message from Julia Carpenter also know as the second..."

"Madame Web, I've heard of you. But why did you come here?" Miguel asked, still suspicious of seeing a long dead psychic from the past.

"As I said, I'm an astral message sent from the real Julia Carpenter before she was comatose due to having a massive vision from the future." The astral Madame Web explained.

"I see, so what message did Madame Web have to send to the several decades ago and of all beings you could've sent it to, why me?" Miguel continued to question.

"Because, you are the only who can prevent time itself from crumbling onto it self. You see..." The astral being turned to the only window in Spider-Man's hideout, showing New York of the future having very strange storm clouds "...Octavius must be defeated by three other spiders, with you included. Otherwise our world will die."

All of a sudden massive strikes of purple lightning began to strike the city itself, with it creating massive "sinkholes" wherever they hit.

"What the shock is going!" Miguel asks as he sees his precious city falling apart.

"Time is starting to decay. You must go to the past and correct the damage Otto Octavius has created but you must ally yourself with the symbiote and the clone." The astral Madame Web said as she showed images of past heroes Agent Venom and the Scarlet Spider.

"Okay, I got to the past and prevent Otto Octavius from taking Peter Parkers body. Seems easy." Miguel said to himself.

"You can't, the time decay created barriers that prevents certain periods from being reached, and that incident is included." Madame Web told Spider-Man.

"So when can I go? Because it looks those dark clouds are coming here!" Miguel demanded.

"When this astral form was sent, Julia used the massive vision she'd seen to find the right time period to create a counter to the time decay and gave this astral projection the ability to create a small rip in the time period you need to go Miguel O'Hara. But I have one last thing to say, they must be revealed..." The astral Madame Web explained as it changed its humanoid form into a man size portal.

"Hey what do you mean reveal them?! God I hate how all knowing beings give vague demands." Miguel complained as he notices that the Alchemax building was starting to disintegrate. "Ah shock! Computer set my scanners to monitor the time decay!"

"SETTINGS SAVE. DECAY ALREADY AT 25% AND GROWING-" The computer said before it cut off due to the time decay.

"Well I guess there's no turning back. I'm coming for you Octavius..." Miguel growled as he jumped into the portal.

Meanwhile in present time, Otto Octavius, as Spider-Man, had Green Goblin, now called the Goblin King, unmasked as Norman Osborn and held by the throat. Octavius had defeated Goblin Kings underground army and faced Osborn on the roof of the Horizon Lab building and brutal defeated him. At this point many people from the media, law enforcement, and even Octavius's ignorant supporter Mayor J. Jonah Jameson watched the battle.

"Well it seems your games are over Osborn. My victory over your filth is at hand!" Otto proclaimed to his defeated enemy.

Norman simply smiled evilly as he whispered "Maybe. But I did start your downfall Octavius..."

Otto's eyes widened under his mask. He must be hearing things. His only response was "How did you..."

Goblin simply chuckled and wheezed "How did I know you stolen Parker's body, killed him in body and mind, and went on a childish charade to be the one thing you original despised? You should've known your army of spider toys has a lot more personal data than you realize."

Octavius simply tightened his free hand into a sharp fist. He forgot how tenacious Osborn was to Parker, he was the one who original found out Peter's identity before loosing that memory somehow and was the man who murdered Gwen Stacy.

"You think your a genius, but in the end you're like a blank dictionary, you're at a lost for words. You are such an idiot Ock, an inferior Spider-Man!" Norman gleefully said as he began to cackle wildly  like the madman he is before suddenly...

*CRACK*

Out of rage of being insulted for his arrogance, Octavius plunged his fist into Osborns chest, killing him instantly. The world stood still as they saw Spider-Man kill again, this time fully shown that this wasn't a murder to "save" lives, but in pure, cold blood.

The next night...

In a dark alleyway, all seemed quiet and still despite being in the city that never sleeps. Out of nowhere, a human size portal opened and Miguel O'Hara, Spider-Man 2099, jumped through. He collected himself and checks his surroundings of modern day New York.

"Wow, everything is so...outdated. Now I need to find Octavius before he kills any..." Miguel thought before a gust of wind launches a newspaper in his face. Annoyed, he grabbed the paper and saw it was The Front Line. His eyes widened as the front page said "SPIDER-MAN MURDERS OSBORN! AVENGERS INVESTIGATE "HERO" AS MAYOR DEFENDS SPIDER-MAN."

"You gotta be kidding me..." Spider-Man 2099 complained to himself as he looked at a watch-like device he brought in order to monitor the time decays. His eyes widened as it read "35%" and was slowly, but steadily growing.

Miguel then cursed to himself "Ah shock."

To be continued.
Spider-Man and all related characters©Marvel Comics.

Images © Their respective owners

I don't own anything!

Well, after long teases and mock promos that are tributes to classic Spidey covers later, the prologue/first chapter of the Inferior Spider-Man is finally here! This is to essential set up the mood and route the story of this fanfic goes and to show that virtually anything is possible. Please leave a comment below on how the start of this fanfic is and also if you have a suggestion, either leave a comment of send me a note as they are most welcomed.
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:iconpumpkinqueen13:
PumpkinQueen13 Featured By Owner Edited Aug 23, 2014  Student General Artist
Just like the others have already said to you, this is a relatively good start to a comic book based fanfic.  I'm not all too familiar with Comic Books as I only see Movie Adaptations based on them.




This is how I critique and review fanfiction:  First, I will discuss the plot and point out any plot gaps (I usually won't go into the Plot for the first chapter since the plot and I have yet to move forward; in the instance that it does I will point out the plot gaps); Second, I will discuss what might need a better description; and lastly, I will discuss any grammar mistakes by taking a segment of the story by Block Quoting it and tell you what needs fixing in regards to grammar.

Note:  Only heed my advice if you desire to take it.

If you do not want a critique/review on your fanfiction, just say the word, and I'll cease.




Plot

:star::star: 3 stars is the highest grade

For months O'Hara has been analyzing Octavius's activities behind his company's back...


He has been studying Otto's activities in the past for weeks and didn't understand how what has been written in history and what is happening in the past doesn't correlate.


Which time frame is it?  Has Miguel studied and analyzed Octavius' activities for months or weeks?


Out of nowhere, a human size portal opened and Miguel O'Hara, Spider-Man 2099 jumped though.

Spider-Man 2099 was introduced earlier; his full introduction is no longer needed later on.



Description
:star::star::star:



Grammar
Only this particular segment of my critique/review tends to be relatively lengthy depending on how long each chapter is.  Note that this also includes  punctuation errors, comma placement errors and the like.  If an error occurs more than once in a chapter or the whole story, I will indicate by simply saying that it is.
Prologue:  Time's are Changing

:bulletblack: "Times"


"He's gone?"  Was all Otto Octavius, now stolen the identity of Peter Parker said.  His great victory.

:bulletblack: Octavius' dialogue is not a question.
:bulletblack: "the" should be moved to after "now"


Otto then rises from the chair and looked at the mirror, admiring his new youth that he'd taken and realized just how it feels to win.

:bulletblack: "rose"
:bulletblack: "felt"


Moments later the call went straight to voicemail and he heard MJ's voice and said "Hey Peter!  I've been calling for a while and I felt that we need to talk.  I need to ask if your alright because the Peter I know would never be a recluse and stay away from those who care!  So please I {need to} man up, come see me."

:bulletblack: A period goes after "voice."
:bulletblack: "and said" should be removed since Octavius is not speaking.
:bulletblack: "You're"
:bulletblack: "You" should be placed between "need" and "to"


"What did that woman said!"

:bulletblack: "say"
:bulletblack: Since it is also a question, a question mark should be placed before the exclamation mark.


"No!  I can't be superior if Peter still holds me down!  If I must make me and this world superior, all aspects of Parker must be erased!  With my unbounded genius, I'll erase Peter's worst enemies...and greatest allies!  I have such great power {and is} my responsibility to do justice!  Parker was a blight to this world and his presence creates more problems then good!  Hell I'm giving his allies a favor, eventually the will die a horrible death and I'm simply giving them a mercy killing.  So says The Superior Spider-Man!"  Octavius thought to himself as he reaches to his {computer begins} to formulate a plan to create his utopia, a "superior" world.

:bulletblack: "myself"
:bulletblack: "unbound"
:bulletblack: "it" should be placed between "and" and "is"
:bulletblack: "created"
:bulletblack: "than"
:bulletblack: "doing"
:bulletblack: "they"
:bulletblack: "The" does not need to be capitalized in the middle of a sentence regardless if it's a title; this error occurs more than once.
:bulletblack: "reached"
:bulletblack: "and" should be placed between "computer" and "begins"
:bulletblack: "began"


In a future with {some the} greatest advancements in human history...

"of" should be placed between "some" and "the"


Alchemax HQ, specifically the speculative science division, head scientist Miguel {O'Hara aka} the Spider-Man of the year {2099 looks} at serveral screens, showing different heroes of the modern times fighting villains and saving lives.  This machine was a "time window", it allowed the view to see into various incidents in the past, but it {was prototype} and can only view the past by at most a full century.

:bulletblack: "In" should be placed before "Alchemax"
:bulletblack: "specifically" should be removed and replaced with "in"
:bulletblack: Commas should be placed between "O'Hara" and "aka," and "2099" and "looks"
:bulletblack: "looked"
:bulletblack: "several"
:bulletblack: The comma goes inside the quotation.  This error occurs more than once in regards to punctuation.
:bulletblack: "viewer"
:bulletblack: "a" should be placed between "was" and "prototype"


For months O'Hara has been analyzing Octavius's activities behind his company's back...

"had;" this error occurs more than once.


Each change in reality has been damaging the time stream, but it can heal if no more major change to time itself happens.

:bulletblack: "had"
:bulletblack: "changes"
:bulletblack: "happened"


O'Hara thought to himself as he looks into the screen showing Otto putting on his Spider-Man costume.  The screen then does it's time jump of a few weeks...

:bulletblack: "looked"
:bulletblack: "did"
:bulletblack: "its"


Miguel then backed off the screen as he knew things are going from bad to worst.  According to the history books, this incident shouldn't have happened, but the screens don't lie, Octavius is going to do what he promised...

:bulletblack: "off" should be removed and replaced with "away from"
:bulletblack: "were"
:bulletblack: "worse"
:bulletblack: "didn't"
:bulletblack: "was"


...including a watch-like gadget be pressed and created his own Spider-Man {costume in} a flash of light.

:bulletblack: "he"
:bulletblack: "created" and "own" should be removed"
:bulletblack: "was created" should be placed between "costume" and "in"


Spider-Man 2099 then goes to his own computer as it says...

:bulletblack: "went"
:bulletblack: "said"


He has been studying Otto's activities in the past for weeks and didn't understand how what has been written in history and what is happening in the past doesn't correlate.

:bulletblack: "had"
:bulletblack: "four"
:bulletblack: "had"
:bulletblack: "was"
:bulletblack: "didn't"


Spider-Man 2099 asks.

"asked"


"...THIS MASSIVE CHANGE IN THE TIMESTREAM WILL CAUSE A CHAIN REACTION TO WHICH RESULTS I CAN NOT PREDICT..."

:bulletblack: "time stream" are two separate words.
:bulletblack: "cannot" is one word.


An ominous female voice is heard.

"was"


Spider-Man 2099 demanded {as {readied} for} a fight.

:bulletblack: "he" should be placed between "as" and "readied"
:bulletblack: "himself" should be placed between "readied" and "for"


"...I am an astral message from Julia Carpenter also know as the second..."

"known"


"...so what message did Madame Web have to send to the several decades ago...

"to the" should be removed and replaced with "from"


"Because, you are the {only who} can prevent time itself from crumbling onto it self..."

:bulletblack: "one" should be placed between "only" and "who"
:bulletblack: "onto it self" should be removed.


...with it creating massive "sinkhole" wherever they hit.

"with it" should be removed.


"What the shock is {going!}" Miguel asks as he sees his precious city falling apart.

:bulletblack: "on" should go after "going"
:bulletblack: A question mark should be placed before the exclamation mark.
:bulletblack: "asked"
:bulletblack: "saw"


"Okay, I got to the past and prevent Otto Octavius from taking Peter Parkers body..."

:bulletblack: "go"
:bulletblack: "Parker's"


"...Because it {looks those} dark clouds are coming here!"

"like" should be placed between "looks" and "those"


The astral Madame Web explained as it changed its humanoid form into a man size portal.

"sized;" this error occurs more than once.


Miguel complained as he notices that the Alchemax building was starting to disintegrate.

"noticed"


...now called the Goblin King, unmasked as Norman Osborn and {held by} the throat.  Octavius had defeated Gobling Kings underground army and faced Osborn on the roof of the Horizon Lab building and brutal defeated him.

:bulletblack: "him" should be placed between "held" and "by"
:bulletblack: "King's"
:bulletblack: "brutally"



His only response was "How did you..."

Question mark goes after the ellipses (...)


{Goblin simply} chuckled and wheezed "How did I know you stolen Parker's body, killed him in body and mind, and went on a childish charade to be the one thing you original despised?..."

:bulletblack: "King" should be placed between "Goblin" and "simply"
:bulletblack: "stole"
:bulletblack: "originally"


...he was the one who original found out Peter's identity before loosing that memory somehow and was the man who murdered Gwen Stacy.

:bulletblack: "originally"
:bulletblack: "losing"


"You think your a genius, but in the end you're like a blank dictionary, you're at a lost for words.  You are such an idiot Ock, an inferior Spider-Man!"  Normal gleefully said as he began to cackle wildly like the madman he is before suddenly.

:bulletblack: "you're"
:bulletblack: "loss"
:bulletblack: "was"


Octavius plunged his fist into Osborns chest...

"Osborn's"


He collected himself and checks his surroundings of modern day New York.

:bulletblack: "checked"
:bulletblack: "Modern Day" since it is referring to a particular time period.


Miguel thought before a gust of wind launches a newspaper in his face.

"launched"

Grammar Grade:  Unfortunately, there are too many errors in order to grade it in regards to grammar.  I suggest proofreading this story as well as your other stories, so that it doesn't appear so jumbled.
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:iconmaxwellcohen5211997:
MaxwellCohen5211997 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student General Artist
This is a great start to an awesome fanfic.

BTW, I'm currently setting up Otto Octavius' downfall in my own fan series, Super Smash Bros. Crossover. Although I've written Octavius in a far more sympathetic light (his time in Peter's body has truly changed him after seeing the determination of the Heroes of Legend and the selflessness of Peter Parker when he sacrifices his life to keep the Kabuto Virus from spreading through Otto, and he regrets the fact that he had to steal Peter's life to become a hero. It also helps that I have not had Otto purge Peter like he did in Issue #9), the effects of the second reboot have caused the events of Ends of the Earth, Dying Wish, and Superior Spider-Man canon to Super Smash Bros. Crossover, and this causes Otto Octavius to be viewed as a complete monster by the Justice League Unlimited. Willing to accept the death penalty for his crimes but not wanting Peter to cease to exist, Otto has equipped his mask with a device that allows the user to view any point and history and reveal his most vile act to the world (which is pretty much going to show the Dying Wish event), with the secondary intention of restoring Peter's memories by reliving the event, and therefore restoring Peter Parker to life.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks! :D

That's...pretty damn interesting :D
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:iconmaxwellcohen5211997:
MaxwellCohen5211997 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student General Artist
No problem.

Yeah, with Super Smash Bros. Crossover I try to be as faithful to the source material as possible, and since Peter's coming back, it would make no sense to keep Otto Octavius as the Superior Spider-Man. However, like I said, I've written Octavius in a far more sympathetic manner, and I intend to make his downfall tragic.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Yeah that's why I think the actual Superior kinda missed an opportunity to make Superior a good redemption story instead of Octavius ruining Peter's relationships
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:iconmaxwellcohen5211997:
MaxwellCohen5211997 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student General Artist
I will admit, Octavius has been getting dumber and dumber as Superior Spider-Man goes on. My best example would have to be the fact that Otto erased the Avengers' scan on him. That was a real smart move, Octavius.

It's really sad when a fan can write better than the actual writers.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
There's a thin line between arrogance and stupidity

Thanks! I use fanfics as a way to practice my writing skills in order to become a comic book artist :D
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:iconmaxwellcohen5211997:
MaxwellCohen5211997 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student General Artist
Yup, and the two series that I have become disillusioned with, Ben 10 and Sonic the Hedgehog, are the perfect examples of this.

I'm currently doing 3 fanfics. They consist of Super Smash Bros. Crossover, Ben 10 Reboot: Redemption Crossover, and Maximum Sonic. I've been writing Super Smash Bros. Crossover the longest, as I mainly use it to let my imagination run wild, although I've recently been using it to pay tribute to writers such as Dwayne McDuffie and Paul Dini. Ben 10 Reboot: Redemption Crossover and Maximum Sonic, on the other hand, are a result of my dissatisfaction with Ben 10: Omniverse and the Modern Sonic games' writing after Unleashed (Colors to Lost World)
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
:nod:

Neat :)
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(1 Reply)
:iconsilverwolfjudge:
SilverWolfJudge Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2013
Arg! Timetraveling! It messes with my mind! 😣
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Just roll with it
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:iconmirz-alt:
mirz-alt Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013   General Artist
:iconsuperfeaturedplz: This piece has been featured in Are You Super - Vol 7
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I saw and thank you very much :D
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:iconazabachesilver:
AzabacheSilver Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is better than reading the real book!
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks :bow:
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:iconsaintheartwing:
SaintHeartwing Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student General Artist
As someone who was willing to give Dan the benefit of the doubt because he really liked Spider-Island..."Superior"'Spider-Man is the biggest betrayal of the character since the deal with the DEVIL.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Yeah Superior was a very jarring thing to happen to Spider-Man since One More Day. At least it looks like it's going to end since nobody stays dead in comics and Peter Parker IS Spider-Man in every other form of media besides the comics, Marvel has to bring him back soon
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:iconsaintheartwing:
SaintHeartwing Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student General Artist
I'm not so sure. Dan Slott said Peter was gonna stay dead in an interview.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
That's what they said about Superman in the 90s
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:iconsaintheartwing:
SaintHeartwing Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student General Artist
But they had four possible Supermans running around for people to examine and see if one had that spark of real Supes in them. We have NONE.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Well there's still Kaine and even though his series willl end in December, he will stick around via the newly announced relaunch of New Warriors. Also it's rumored that Miles Morales along with Ultimate Gwen Stacy will stay in the regular Marvel after the events of Cataclysm so Miles could take on Otto and be a real successor tp Peter
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:iconsaintheartwing:
SaintHeartwing Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2013  Student General Artist
THAT would be very much appreciated. Dan Slott's utterly screwed over all good faith the fans had in him. He made NYC trust and admire Peter again. Got rid of the Carlie Cooper relationship. Got Peter back his spider-sense and got Kaine back to normal...and then ruined EVERY trace of good will he'd accumulated by deleting the final traces of Peter from existence.
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:icondrwho09:
drwho09 Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2013
Not really a marvel fan but this is very good and reminds me a little of Simon Furman's classic Transformers UK story Time Wars.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks! I am interested in those classic transformers comics but since they are older, they're kinda hard to hard. Also if you like this prologue, check out my gallery and read the remaining chapters so far ;)
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:icondrwho09:
drwho09 Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2013
I've read all this story so far and it's better than the vast majority of Marvel comics I've ever read and you may be interested to know that IDW are publishing those Transformers stories as Best of Transformers UK and you should be able to get them them online or from any bookshop.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks and sure, I'll check them out as I have nostalgia for Transformers :D
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Fair enough. Also, if and when Peter comes back to life in the marvel universe, do you think he will distance himself from people do to the fact that he is upset and hurt that no one figured out that he was replaced by a very poor imposter and apparently died?
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I think only those very close will trust hin, but to everyone else, he'll have to rebuild their trust
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Last question for now, I just remembered someone bringing up the fact since Peter sold his marriage to Mephisto, his soul would go to hell. And yet his ghost appeared in The Superior Spiderman series, meaning it was either the remnants of Peter inside his body or something else entirely (like Doc Ock's conscience taking the form of Peter as a ghost. Your thoughts on this theory.
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Well I heard Marvel will end The Superior Spiderman comic and bring back the true Spiderman when "The Amazing Spiderman 2" comes out in April 2014. Also, how do you feel about Jaime Foxx and Paul Giamatti playing Electro and The Rhino as well as Chris Cooper playing Norman Osborn.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
As I seen, I have hopes for Foxx as
Electro as his design looks really cool. I'm glad they gave him a new darker version of Ultimate Comics version of Electro as to be honest regular Electro has a rather silly costume (though I like the burned face Electro in the recent books though the suit still looks silly). The other actors I have no real opinion as I have to wait until the movie comes out.
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
To be honest I do not know how to create a link. In fact you are the second person I sent comments too. The first being KoltirasRip, author and creator of bleach redux.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Oh ok it's cool. I actualy found the fanfic on google and it's pretty cool :D
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Nevermind, here is the link. [link]
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Oops. I think I sent you the same question
twice. I was not sure if I saved it before sending it to you, so if you two comments instead of one, I strongly apologized for the confusion.
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Hey it's cool. But yeah I'll check out that fanfic, think you can send me a link?
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Whoops forgot to put got in between you and two.
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
That's okay, I only asked because I was confused when I the first madame Webb on your character list and I was not sure if you knew she died. By the way, the next time you go to fan fiction.net, check out The Astonishing Spider-Fan's story "The Unstoppable Spiderman". It is so far only two chapters long, but it is worth to check it out especially in the second chapter.
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
That's okay, I only asked because I was confused when I saw the first madame Webb on your character list and I was not sure if you knew she died. By the way, next time you go to fan fiction.net, check out The Astonishing Spider-Fan's story "The Unstoppable Spiderman". It is so far only two chapters long, but it is worth it especially in the second chapter.
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:iconseanc001:
seanc001 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013
Great story man. One question though, on the list of characters that would appear in this story you said the first Madame Webb would be in it. However, did she not die in the hunt storyline and if so are you going to bring her back? Also, before she ended up in a coma, Julia Carpenter told Peter that Silver Sable survived drowning at the hands of The Rhino. If that is true will she make an appearance later in the story?
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
What I have planned for the first Madame Web is a secret and sorry but I don't plan on having Silver Sable into this story unless I fit her in somehow. But Thanks for the feedback though :D
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:iconspiderdude10:
Spiderdude10 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
THAT WAS GREAT
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks! What do you like about the prologue?
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:iconspiderdude10:
Spiderdude10 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
pretty much everything
its a great story coming off of whats going in the comic right now :)
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks :D
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:iconspiderdude10:
Spiderdude10 Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
no prob
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:iconspidervenom123:
Spidervenom123 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013
cool
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks! So what do you like about the prologue (and the beginning of the fanfic so far)
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:iconspidervenom123:
Spidervenom123 Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013
well I didn't except norman osborn to die so soon because well he's the big bad of the spidey franchise and so be more involved. I just flash kaine and miguel give him the ironic defeat he deserves
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:iconblacksuitchris:
blacksuitchris Featured By Owner Jun 22, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Well having Goblin killed so soon came from two things
1. It was slightly inspired by the opening cut scene of Injustice.
2. I wanted to make Otto the main antagonist of this story so having him kill Osborn establishes that aspect.
And as such Agent Venom, Scarlet Spider, and Spidey 2099 will give Otto one the biggest humiliation ever!
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